Even in the Darkness

"Where can I go from your Spirit?
    Where can I flee from your presence?
 If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
    if I make my bed in the depths,^[a] you are there.

If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
    if I settle on the far side of the sea,
 even there your hand will guide me,
    your right hand will hold me fast.

If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me

    and the light become night around me,”

even the darkness will not be dark to you;

    the night will shine like the day,

    for darkness is as light to you."

Psalm 139:7-12

I remember so vividly memorizing this Psalm for my 3rd grade sunday school class.  I can picture myself leaning up against the wall  outside the Sunday school room on Sunday morning trying to learn the verses well enough to recite them to the my teacher, who happened to be my aunt.  I remember while I was learning it I had the picture in my head of a child  sitting on a bed in a room all by himself.  Every time I hear Psalm 139 I see that same picture.  Most of the time, when I am in dark days, I feel alone.  The last few months have felt like dark days.  One thing I can't comprehend, though, is how close the Lord has been to me.  I am not alone and I don't feel alone.  I hear Him say to me,  "The same things that break your heart, are breaking my heart too."  

I Love the Lyrics to the J.J. Heller song Your Hands:

I have unanswered prayers
I have trouble I wish wasn't there
And I have asked a thousand ways

That you would take my pain away (or sometimes I sing "other people's pain")
You would take my pain away

I am trying to understand
How to walk this weary land
Make straight the paths that crooked lie
Oh Lord, before these feet of mine
Oh Lord, before these feet of mine

When my world is shaking, heaven stands
When my heart is breaking
I never leave your hands

Sometimes are pain will never go away on this side of Heaven, but he never stops holding us. Heaven Stands. Even in the darkness he is there.